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Columns
In high school I had the drama bug. And the comedy bug. But my multi-task didn't aid my quest for trophies, pitted against TellTale Guy.
If it’s true that religion was invented to keep poor people happy, than Islam is a booming religion on every front of this young century.
Based on the vegetarian philosophy, if consistent, every time lions eat a gazelle they are committing cannibalism. Vegetarians claim, we are not supposed to eat animals because we ARE animals.
I’ve always insisted that motherhood does not define me. Yeah, right.
When science fiction writer Ray Bradbury agreed to speak for my writing club's banquet, I had no idea I would be the one chauffeuring him in my neighbor's borrowed, fogged-up Cadillac.
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Impressionist and entertainer Fred Travalena passed away this week. I remember watching him on TV when I was a kid and being completely blown away by his impressions. He made me laugh and laugh. The news reported this week that he was such a good impressionist that filmmakers used him when they needed to rerecord dialogue in films, rather than calling the actors back in. That's a good impressionist.
Funeral arrangements have been announced for Travalena, and I asked a couple of NCV columnists to share their thoughts about Travalena, who was a Christian. Bananas' host Thor Ramsey also c...
COMMON SAINTS #01 - June 18th, 2009 at 2:05pm
Click on the headline above to see the cartoon full size.
...
So, Sarah Palin has accepted David Letterman’s apology, “on behalf of all young women, like my daughters, who hope men who ‘joke’ about public displays of sexual exploitation of girls will soon evolve.” This is her latest handsmacking of the apparently Cro-Magnon comic, Letterman.
Really? She wants Letterman to evolve? She believes in evolution? She is eroding her base, methinks!
It’s all politics. Palin coulda come out against jokes against her fam on any number of occasions over the last year. Conan O’Brien, Craig Ferguson, Jon Stewart, Jay Leno, and SNL have all ...
Palin Overload - June 12th, 2009 at 11:47am
So, if you haven’t heard about the Letterman/Palin squabble, you are well blessed.
Here’s how it goes: Letterman makes some untoward remarks about the oldest Palin girl. Tasteless, yes. (See video below.) That’s his business. If you are seeing red on behalf of the Palins, let me ask you this: Do you have a clue about his demographic? Do you really want to censor comics? Then move to another country. In this one, we get to make jokes about what we want.
First of all, the Palins are overreacting. Because in this climate, reacting at all was overreacting. Take a hint from the Carte...
Emergent Worrying - June 9th, 2009 at 10:28am
I was thinking a lot this weekend about something I have heard various and sundry friends say recently against the “emergent church.”
Now, I know a little about the emergent church, and from what I’ve seen, there is quite a range of beliefs going on there. From not believing the inerrancy of the Bible, to not being sure if there are miracles anymore – or if there ever were – to believing all of those things, but maybe wondering about evolution. . . . It’s all over the map. Frankly, not unlike in the traditional church. What I have discerned in my readings on this over the...
Comedian, Promote Thy Self - June 4th, 2009 at 2:52pm
Just back from the Christian Comedy Association Conference, where we regularly talk about all sorts of issues, including business, road loneliness, performance tips, and what to stay away from at the hotel breakfast bar.
The thing we always seem to come back to, and it’s a great truth, is that it is not about US. Or, to be more specific, it is not about ME. Sometimes I wish it were. I’m a comic, so I admit to an ego. But I’m a follower of Christ, so it’s a bizarre concept to spend time promoting – yourself.
I struggled with this from the beginning. I was always taught the “...
Last night the worship leader from Conway, Arkansas, Kris Allen, pulled off what might be the biggest upset in American Idol history when he beat out the glam rocker from San Diego, Adam Lambert for the title of American Idol.
Allen spent much of the season in the shadow of fellow worship leader Danny Gokey, who was favored to go to the finals with Lambert. Gokey's poignant personal story - his wife passed away just four months before he auditioned for the show - helped propel him to the finals. Lambert was favored to win the competition, even getting the judges' endorsement when Simo...
It's hard to believe, but last night was the final night of performances on season 8 of American Idol. It came down to the aw, shucks worship leader from Conway, Arkansas, Kris Allen, and the glam rocker from Los Angeles, Adam Lambert. Or as Ryan Seacrest said, the guy next door vs. guyliner.
The guys each sang three songs last night: their favorite song from the season, a song chosen by Idol producer Simon Fuller, and the Idol single co-written by judge Kara DioGuardi.
Round one went to Kris Allen, who reprised his paino version of "Ain't No Sunshine." It was even better...
No, I'm not psychic, but I called tonight's American Idol results show - well, part of it, anyway. I knew Kris was going through to the finale, but whether he was going to be joined by Adam or Danny? I wavered, up until this afternoon.
And in the end? It's Adam and Kris in the finale, next week on American Idol! And I'm predicting Kris to win.
For Danny Gokey fans, don't worry. Getting voted off can actually be good for a contestant; he can do his own music without the Idol ball and chain dictating his every move. I'm sure there are several labels waiting to scoop him up.
So...
You Don't Know My Life! - May 14th, 2009 at 1:35pm
I was accused on Facebook last night of supporting the subjugation and murder of “women, Native Americans, gays, blacks, Mexicans, Asians” and anyone else who doesn’t share my faith. I thought it was weird that he thought all those groups automatically don’t share my faith, but thought that was a bunny trail. Weirder still, I AM a woman, and a little bit Cherokee . . . soooooo . . . where does that leave him?
I was blamed for heinous crimes against humanity . . . all on a thread because I called a guy on his prejudice against Christians. I chuckled, but then I thought how sad i...
Last night, the final three American Idol contestants - Danny Gokey, Adam Lambert and Kris Allen - performed two songs each and proved that it's still anyone's game to win. Despite what the judges think.
Each contestant performed a song chosen for him by the judges, and then a personal choice. Clearly, these artists know better what kind of music they want to make; their personal song choices were much better suited to their vocal talents. For the judges' choice:
Adam Lambert sang Simon's choice, "One" by U2
Danny Gokey sang Paula's choice, "Dance Little Sister"...
Okay, that is a belabored title, but it reflects the sitch in today’s world, no? We are very very scared, a lot of us. Finances are unreliable, people are getting laid off. My husband and I are calmer than you would think. Because we are artists (he’s an actor and director), and we have lived most of our adult lives with no guarantee of work month-to-month much less year-to-year.
So, we wondering if, now, a lot of other people know what artists go through every single day of our lives. It takes a lot of guts and perseverance to be an artist in our society, a freelancer, a comic, an a...
On Wednesday's results show, the only female left in the competition, Allison Iraheta, was voted off, leaving Danny Gokey, Kris Allen and Adam Lambert to vie for the title of American Idol.
Daughtry performed their new single live, and No Doubt performed "I'm Just A Girl." Even Paula Abdul got into the act, performing ... or lip synching ... her new single. I found out afterwards that both Paula's and No Doubt's performances were taped on Tuesday, with lots of takes and editing for airing on Wednesday. Yeeesh. I knew she wasn't going to actually perform live.
The...
Can you believe that we're down to the final four on this season of American Idol? Seems like just yesterday we were in Hollywood for the first week of auditions.
Last night, Kris Allen, Adam Lambert, Allison Iraheta and Danny Gokey sang rocks songs ranging from classic rock to pop rock, proving that Adam and Allison had a leg up with the genre. The guest mentor, Slash from Guns N' Roses fame, offered up advice and some guitar back up while the contestants practiced on the stage at the Roxy club to give them the full rock experience.
During dress rehearsal, there was an accident ...
I am making a plea to you today: Please don’t blame Jesus for all the crappy Christians.
If you are reading this, and you are ready to throw the baby (Jesus) out with the bathwater (stinky, mean Christians), I want to tell you, that we’ve all been there. That Jesus is not that. Even the nice, peacemaking, compassionate Christians get really really tired of the stinky bathwater Christians. I want you to know that.
I want to plead with you to look closely at Christ and forgive Christians for dragging his name through the mud. A big, big, request, I know.
I want you to k...
Hydroxy-blog - May 1st, 2009 at 6:00pm
So, they’ve recalled Hydroxycut. Seems it causes liver damage. Dangit. Just because we want to lose weight, doesn’t mean we want to do it by losing organs. When will the corporations figure that out?
It was my last try before having to resort to something really desperate: diet and exercise. Ha! I hate doing things that I hate.
I do walk a good bit, and I kayak when I can. I haven’t eaten beef in about 18 years, and I eat a lot of fish. No point here, just braggin’ on my good points.
The kind of Hydroxycut I have is the little paper tubes of powder, so you can pour it ...
The remaining Top 5 American Idol contestants performed Rat Pack standards on Tuesday, and one thing was very clear: this is may be the most talented roster of contestants American Idol has had in a very long time.
Kris, Danny, Allison and Matt stuck to the genre, crooining and belting out classy, jazzy hits - Kris sang "The Way You Look Tonight;" Danny sang "Come Rain Or Come Shine;" Allison sang "Someone to Watch Over Me;" and Matt sang "My Funny Valentine." Adam, as usual, added his own touch to "Feeling Good," but while it was a gr...
Prop ATE - April 28th, 2009 at 5:05pm
(Disclaimer: Before you read this, please understand that my weight is the struggle of my life. I’m technically, medically, socially, “overweight.” I like myself, and have a GREAT personality, so don’t cry for me, Argentina, but I just want those of you who are thinness-challenged, that I’m with ya. And that there is no harm meant us by the following blog post. I’m making another point entirely. Hopefully.)
Here goes:
If you are taking away gay marriage rights, because you think it's sin, I think you should also take away buffet rights from all the gluttons.
The buffet...
Call 1-866-I-N-E-R-R-A-N-T or text your vote to 24253, but please wait until the very end of the show.
I was wondering aloud at my pastor’s book group last week, if the Bible can ever be an idol. If we can hold it up goofily like a gold calf on the end of a stick (in Charlton Heston’s absence) and point to it, in all its “inerrant” glory, its perfection, as the be-all end-all, rather than paying attention to its message and purpose. Which is to deliver the history and background of the person of Jesus Christ. The Word made flesh. Know whut I mean?
Like, can we cling so much t...
Greetings, all! I'm away this week in Nashville for Gospel Music Week, so we'll point you to The Huffington Post for a recap of the American Idol Top 6. Or check out my BeliefNet readers who tried to fill me in. We're getting down to the wire! I'll be back with the results on Thursday. See you then!
(Just for the record, I didn't write that post, LOL. At least not all of it. I've never read the Huffington Post Idol recaps, and Beliefnet is one word, with one cap. But thanks to whoever did the update while I was away .... Joanne)
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If I was writing a screenplay about Jesus, (and I’m not saying I AM, and I’m not saying I’m NOT), I would do lots of extra research on Jesus and his character. I do that anyway, as a follower of Christ. It’s always amazing, no? I follow him, get it? That is why I have checked him out. I don’t want to be shuffling along behind some goober who won’t read directions, or never knew them in the first place.
You know what? Jesus defies definition. He’s always beyond us and what we can grasp, but always close enough to affect everything we do. Even if it’s something he wouldn...
“I am optimistic that Jesus will survive American Christian Culture. He’s been through worse.”
Quoting myself of all things, because that is my most recent Facebook Status Update.
I'm talking about the culture which seeks to put and keep Jesus in a box. Which lays out speedbump after speedbump before whatever group they deem unworthy.
And then, using scriptures (usually taken out of context) as a weapon to divide, build a full-on wall in front of Jesus. God’s waiting room, and they are the snotty receptionist. “And you are?” as in the old SNL/David Spade sketc...
Tonight, American Idol made history as the judges used their one and only save to keep Matt Giraud in the competition for one more week.
Anoop, Matt and Lil were in the bottom three tonight, and when it came down to Anoop and Lil, Simon said he'd consider using the save on one contestant and it might surprise them to know which one. Well, we were surprised all right, because after Matt sang Simon told him that he sang better the night before and didn't have a chance of winning the competition.
But amidst the crowds' chants of "Save! Save!" Simon said it was good news, a...
Last night, the Top 7 American Idol contestants performed songs from movies, with guest mentor Quentin Tarantino. I'm not sure what a movie director brings to a music competition, but Tarantino definitely had some good advice for the contestants, if only from a performance perspective.
There was one quirky change to last night's show: since the performances ran long last week, putting the show past its one hour time slot, this week the judges gave feedback in teams of two. So each contestant only heard from either Randy & Kara, or Paula & Simon. Simon says the problem was the wo...
It was the end of the road last night on American Idol for Scott MacIntyre. Joining him in the bottom three were Anoop Desai and Lil Rounds. Ryan said that of the 34 million votes cast, only 30,000 separated Anoop and Scott, which probably doesn't bode well for Anoop next week.
Scott's swan song last night was much, much better than this performance on Wednesday, and the judges actually looked like they were debating about using the save. Simon said two judges wanted to keep him, but as the clock ticked down he had to make a decision, and he sent Scott ome.
I don't think Scott was ...
Last night on American Idol the Top 8 contestants performed songs from the year they were born, and two things were clear: most of the contestants were born the same year as my daughter, which makes me feel really old, and I hate a lot of songs from the 80s.
Danny Gokey kicked off the show with a Mickey Gilley's rendition of "Stand By Me." It was great, great, great.
Kris Allen followed up with a funky version of "All She Wants To Do Is Dance," which I really liked. That's ironic, considering that I actually hate the song, but he version was so different that ...
Last week I gave you the update on the American Idol Top 9 performances but forgot to tell you who went home! Thankfully, it was Megan. Not only did she sing badly, she acted like a total jerk on the results show. I've been ready for her to go for a while, and it turns out I'm not the only one. HCD Research reported that last week, Megan was voted most likely to go home in the company's weekly viewer survey.
Joanne Brokaw is the host of the Gospel Soundcheck blog at Beliefnet.com. She's blogging about American Idol at NewChristianVoices.com. Check back every week for new posts and Ido...
This week, the American Idol Top 9 were able to chose from top songs from iTunes, which means that there should have been no excuses for bad song choices. Too bad some of the contestants still managed to pick songs that weren't right for them.
Megan Corkrey sang Bob Marley/Lauren Hill's "Turn Your Lights Down Low." And it was a bad as every other time she's sung this season. Worse, if that's possible. Lil Rounds sang Celine Dion's "Surrender" and made me wonder if she really can sing; the judges said it was the wrong song but she showed she can really sing. I don't ...
This week on American Idol, the Top 10 were whittled down to the Top 9, and all I can ask is: Why is Megan Corkrey not in the bottom three?
Last night's results show gave us a shocker, as Matt Giraud was one of the bottom two contestants. There's no way he should have been there; Motown week was very good to him, and his performace of "Let's Get It On" was great.
The contestant who should have been in the bottom three and wasn't was Megan Corkrey. Her version of "For Once in My Life" sounded like something you'd hear on a discount cruise ship. Even DialIdol.c...
Pickin' and Choosin' - March 25th, 2009 at 2:14pm
I've been yammerin' about the "issue" of gay marriage for years (and incessantly for the past few weeks). First of all, I put it in quotes because, I take issue with the fact that it's an issue! Second of all, I've had gay friends for forever and Christian friends for forever. So, it comes up.
The same points are brought up each time by anti-gay-marriage Christians, and the same points always end up in us agreeing to disagree. (Except for one really surly and ignorant creep, but I won't go there. To spend time on guys like that just feeds the devil bonbons. The rest of us jus...
American Idol Top 11 Results - March 19th, 2009 at 10:52am
Last night, we got the results from the American Idol Top 11's performances. Ryan started the night by saying they were shocking, but in the end it was just as I predicted.
The bottom three ended up being Alexis Grace, Michael Sarver and Allison Iraheta; I suppose it's shocking that Allison would be in the bottom three, but statistically, someone has to be there. We all knew she wasn't going home.
So it came down to Michael Sarver and Alexis Grace, and in the end, Alexis went home. There was a minute where Simon said the judges had considered using their save for her, but after sh...
Last night's American Idol was all about the Grand Ole Opry country, with guest mentor Randy Travis. With so many songs to choose from, it promised to be a great night that would highlight the contestants' diverse talents.
Unfortunately, Lil Rounds really disappointed, as did Alexis Grace. Megan Corkrey sang her best so far, even though she had she flu (go figure). Danny Gokey was great, although that coat was weird and I thought last night, Kris Allen outsang him. Matt Giraud was amazing. Scott MacIntrye was nice. Allison Iraheta was amazing as always. Anoop really stepped up his game. ...
Sweet I'm Not - March 16th, 2009 at 7:19pm
Today I was thinking about being sweet, then I thought - naaaaah. I have a friend who is very sweet who admonished a group to pray that God would make them "sweet women." Now, I think that's a fine thing to be, if that is what you are, but it is a leap to say that is God's goal for us, specifically, as women. Nowhere does it say that. The Bible, I mean. It says a lot about how sweet honey is, and more power to it!
I believe we are to be kind, for sure. That's different than "sweet." In fact, I have a bracelet which says "kindness" in 17 languages, just to prove...
Gay Rights Equals - What?! - March 11th, 2009 at 5:34pm
Hey, y'all,
I have been discussing gay rights and women's rights for quite some time. Since I believe in rights. It follows. I am really tired of the same old arguments of equating homosexuality with other sins, i.e., incest. Not the same. Look it up. Good grief.
The thing I cannot get out of my craw is that people who claim that family is the most important thing in the world to them are dead-set against gay families. Because it doesn't fit their definition. Maybe I feel this way because I see the same disenfranchisement of gay people that I see of women in our society. You've ...
Stuff Jesus DID Say - March 9th, 2009 at 4:57pm
With all the talk regarding Proposition 8, it would be nice to hear more emphasis on some stuff Jesus actually talked about, wouldn't it? I have been talking a lot lately with friends (Christian and not) about how obsessed Christian-land is with gay marriage. My response to the bans and to those who are spending so much time fighting gay marriage is, "What's it to ya?" How do you actually think that will affect you? It won't.
If you vote against gay marriage, you are considering rights you have, and making sure they are taken away from other people. WWJD?
Focus on the F...
Chicken Little Christians - March 3rd, 2009 at 3:37pm
God is big. We are not in control. All things work to the good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28). Stuff we've heard over and over and over, if we've been Christians for more than a New York Nanosecond. Do you really believe that crazy stuff? I do. Bigtime.
So, I'm constantly amazed (okay, and irritated) to hear Christians yelping that the sky is falling, because they didn't get the Prez they voted for this time. (I did, but hey.) Talk about some freakin' sour, not to mention paranoid, grapes. In the past two weeks I have heard or read these te...
Tony Guerro, Director of Creative Arts at Saddleback Church and monthly columnist for Worship Leader Magazine, is compiling a book of funny stories about worship, and he's looking for stories.
It doesn't look like there's any compensation, but instead he's taking short blog-comment-style entries. To check out the project, head over to A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Throne.
...
On my blog at Beliefnet.com, I did a post called You Might Be A Christian Music Fan If ...
In it, I listed some stereotypical Christian music things, like:
... you didn't let your kids listen to the Jonas Brothers, until you found out they were Christians.
... you did let your kids listen to David Archuleta, until you found out he was Mormon.
... you cried when the American Idol contestants sang "Shout To The Lord" on national television.
... you'll go see Third Day play at a mega-church but won't go see them at your local concert arena.
Can yo...
Hey, NCV readers! Now you can network with NCV on your favorite social networking site:
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Pregnant "man" pregnant again - November 15th, 2008 at 10:31am
Seriously, I'm totally creeped out. I read a press release announcing that the pregnant "man" is pregnant again.
Thomas Beatie was born a woman, but at 34 she ... he ... "underwent multiple medical treatments to biologically, socially and legally re-identify as a man," according to a press release. The only thing he ... she ... didn't change was his ... her ... reproductive organs. He ... she ... wanted to someday have a baby. When Beatie married, his ... the wife, Nancy, was unable to have children, so viola! They took advantage of Beatie's uterus and spawned.
...
My Erma conference pal Kelsey Timmerman is getting ready to release his book, Where Am I Wearing? and TIME magazine reviewed it. (Scroll all the way to the bottom.) Way to go, Kelsey!
Here's the book description:
Ninety-seven percent of our clothes are made overseas. Yet globalization makes it difficult to know much about the origin of the products we buy--beyond the standard "Made in" label. So journalist and blogger Kelsey Timmerman decided to visit each of the countries and factories where his five favorite items of clothing were made and meet the workers. He kne...
I confess that I didn't even stay up to watch the election returns last night. While I held out a tiny hope my candidate would pull off a miracle, at heart I knew the race was over.
Did I wake up angry that my candidate lost? Am I in fear of what will happen to my country? Of course not. I live in AMERICA, the land of the free and the home of the brave, where our founding fathers built a republic and forged a Constitution that allowed for checks and balances and the right of the people to elect leaders who best represent their views.
Here in America, we wage a fierce campaign and...
NCV takes on Election 2008 - November 1st, 2008 at 5:30pm
If you thought you knew what Christians had to say about Election 2008, think again. At www.NewChristianVoices.com we've let our columnists and writers sound off on both sides of the red/blue aisle. Here are links to some of the most popular essays:
The Raving Redhead: Dr. Dobson and Mr. Hyde
By Teresa Roberts Logan
I'm a fan of cheesy horror stuff. But Dr. James Dobson’s “Letter From 2012" was too scary, even for me.
http://www.newchristianvoices.com/column/the-raving-redhead-dr-dobson-and-mr-hyde
Obama Reminds Me of a Teenager
By Dan Kulp
I love teenagers, I just d...
There's a video called The Front Fell Off making the rounds, of an Australian politician being interviewed about a tanker accident that spilled 20,000 gallons of crude oil into the ocean.
It's hilarious and could be a Saturday Night Live skit - that's because, according to Snopes.com, it is a skit from the 1990s from Australian comedy duo John Clarke and Brian Dawe. The two often did skits based on mock interviews, with Clarke playing the beleagured politician being grilled by interviewer Dawe.
Check out the video at the ChristianHumorWriters.com blog. It's not true, but it's ...
FoxNews.com reports that a woman in Connecticut has sued L'Oreal, claiming the company ruined her life when she accidentally dyed her hair brunette. The article says she "can never return to her natural blonde hue, a shock that left her so traumatized she needed anti-depressants." The woman, Charlotte Feeney of Stratford, CT, says she "missed the attention that blondes receive and had to stay home and wear hats most of the time."
Gee, that poor thing. Maybe I can use that excuse sometime. "Your Honor, I was speeding because I needed to get home before someon...
Cheesy Christian videos or jokes - September 12th, 2008 at 4:09pm
I've stumbled across two Christian music videos that are either great parodies of Christian music or very sad example of CHristian music history. Unfortunately, one is real (and only a year old!). The other? I hope it's a joke ... you can read the whole story at my Gospel Soundcheck blog.
...
September 11 - September 11th, 2008 at 9:29am
Has it been seven years since terrorists took down the World Trade Center buildings, hit the Pentagon, and crashed in a field in Pennsylvania? Sometimes it seems like it was a million years ago, and at other times it feels like just yesterday.
I remember that day so clearly, watching the towers get hit, hearing the news that there'd been an explosion at the Pentagon, then watching the towers fall to the ground.
I think it's important, on this day, to remember everything that happened on 9/11 so that we don't start veering off into lunatic conspiracy theories that our own govern...
LOST AND FOUND - September 11th, 2008 at 9:34am
There's a series of products and services available to help people recover lost or stolen items like cars, computers, cameras, or cell phones. These programs will not only track missing items, some help the owner erase sensitive information on the missing item – like a laptop or cell phone - thereby protecting the owner from identity theft. Sounds like a wonderful idea.
Following along these lines, I have gathered a group of scientists, who are developing programs for other missing items that cause undue stress and increased financial burden on consumers.
Like socks. I confess I ...
Four Letter Words - September 5th, 2008 at 4:45pm
Mike and I had a discussion this morning. I used a four letter word and he used a double four letter word.
I mentioned, “Diet,” and he said, “Exer-cise.”
Yuck! Whoops! There’s another four letter word, but it’s appropriate here and I mean it!
Being born in the South, cooking and eating are part of my heritage. In fact, it is considered a competitive sport. Fried chicken – fried anything! – mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans seasoned with bacon drippings, homemade yeast rolls slathered with butter and pecan pie washed down by a tall chilled glass of brewed ...
NCV is on MySpace! - September 3rd, 2008 at 12:15pm
New Christian Voices is now on MySpace! Be our friend - visit us at www.myspace.com/newchristianvoices!
...
We're Twittering! - August 16th, 2008 at 6:01pm
Are you twittering? We are! Follow us on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/ncv
And you can follow me, Joanne Brokaw, at Twitter, too:
https://twitter.com/joannebrokaw
...
Chinese confiscate Bibles - September 3rd, 2008 at 10:02am
With all eyes on Beijing China had hoped to put on a good face for the whole world. Well, I hope Americans are paying attention and realize how good we really have it here.
Never mind the stories about athletes taken as toddlers from their families and raised to become Olympic contenders. How 'bout that one gymnast who called her family and wanted to come home, and they told her no? Seems their home and livelihood were given to them by the government as compensation for taking their child at the age of three. She comes home, they're out in the cold.
And how about the coach of the...
Reuters reports that the world's oldest recorded joke dates back to 1900 B.C. And guess what? It was a potty humor joke.
Surprise!
The joke was a saying of the Sumerians, who lived in what is now southern Iraq: "Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap."
Uh ... alrighty ...
Second oldest recorded joke? This 1600 BC gag: "How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish."
Whoa,...
I knew it was coming. My five children had all been born within a five year period – and four within three years – and I often felt like the little old woman who lived in a shoe. The kids were now approaching their latter teens. It was only a matter of time before the sound of eardrum-piercing music ceased, laundry shrunk from fifteen to a maintainable three loads a week, and the pantry stayed stocked for longer than two hours after returning home from the grocery store.
That day was on the horizon and it would have been a lie to say I wasn’t looking forward to it. I would be abl...
According to author Benita Long, the problem with cookbooks is that they’re all about cooking. She thinks it’s a problem that cookbooks are filled with measurements, recipes, and lists of ingredients.
Seriously.
I'm not sure what a cookbook should be filled with, if not information on how to cook. Maybe instructions on how to hang drywall or install a garbage disposal? The correct way to determine your bra size or a step-by-step guide to coloring your own hair?
According to Long, a cookbook should not only offer information about cooking, but be inspiring as well. Her n...
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