Time Out: Running on Empty Calories

Against my better judgment, I am training for a half marathon this spring. And it’s not what I expected.

I expected training to give me unbearably sore muscles that make my legs feel like they’re wrapped in iron. I expected to lose huge chunks of free time listening to my feet pound the ground, instead of doing more productive things like watching Lost reruns. I expected to lose all sensation in my digits while running for two hours in 24-degree weather. Really, I’m okay with all that.

What I am NOT okay with is the fact that all this training is making me gain weight. Seriously. What kind of cruel joke is that?

I’ve heard stories from friends who trained in the past that such things could happen, but I didn’t believe them. Really, if you run ten miles, which we all know burns something close to 340,000 calories, how could you possibly eat enough food in your post-run meal to tip the scales against you? How many Oreos is that?

Okay, so maybe this gets to the root of my problem. Apparently, the preferred post-run meal is not a package and a half of Oreos, no matter how many glasses of milk you dunk them in. Apparently, even though I’m running three times a week and cross training and upping my weekly mileage at a safe yet ambitious rate like those running magazines tell you to, I still need to make good eating choices. Apparently, polishing off a bag of Hint-of-Lime Tostitos isn’t considered proper “refueling your body.”

And that’s where this whole training thing gets on my nerves.

Because, let’s be honest, I’m not training for this race to actually win it. (Shocker! I’m a 42-year old mother of two running her first half marathon.) I’m training so that by the time spring comes and I climb out of my full-body puffy down coat to put on a pair of shorts, I don’t frighten small children. 

I do enjoy running, and I’m happy to show my daughters that it’s important to get outdoors and exercise, even in the dead of winter. But if I can’t splurge on anything other than a fruit and yogurt smoothie (made with whey powder for extra protein – yummy), then really, is it all worth it?

Cara Garretson is a freelance writer based near Washington, D.C. who appreciates the fine art of carbo-loading.

Read more of Cara's Time Out columns: 

• Attitude Adjustment, Part II
• Hello 21st Century
• Attitude Adjustment
• Modern Convenience
• Pinch an Inch
• Like Mother, Like Daughters
• Good Morning Sunshine!