The Raving Redhead: Transparency and Our Friend Jeff

I was mentioning to my pastor the other day that I know I’m too transparent, but that was how I was raised.

He asked me “What is wrong with being transparent?”, and you know, he was right. Except that I tend to talk to myself, transparency shouldn’t really bother anyone. I do think what happens when you are very transparent, is you get hurt on a regular basis, because you are always putting yourself out there.

And as a follower of Christ, you try not to develop those callouses you’ve seen on so many people in life. Metaphorical callouses, so don’t go diggin’ out your PedEgg. The callouses I mean are the ones where you can see that some people don’t feel the bumps and the prickles anymore. They have built up such hardness, so they feel free to inflict such things on others. They have forgotten that some of that stuff hurts.

In the South, in the culture I was raised, you say what you think. Even if it’s not so subtle. That is why the South is so colorful! There are a lot of characters here. We like it that way.

I share how I’m feeling, I share my faith journey. I share exactly what I’m thinking about.

I remember doing a MOPS (Mothers Of Pre-Schoolers) talk one time in Denver, and I was fine the whole time, but near the end, I just started crying. And it was totally unrelated to what I was talking about. So I’m sure some of those women thought I was crazy. Others were thinking, “Hey, I do that, too!”, and others were thinking, “Is she getting paid for this?”

Well, dear reader, what I was crying about was my three friends who had committed suicide within six months. And I had just found out about two of them within five days of each other. The latest news had reached me that morning. So, sometimes, you can put on your makeup and be funny for an hour and no one will ever know (which is what you almost always do), but now and then, God uses your “weakness” and your vulnerability as a teaching moment. To teach you, if no one else.  I did share with the group what was going on. I think it really put them in the mood to do that craft they had planned!!

And this week, to be honest, I’m having a little trouble being happy or funny. So I’m gonna share why. There is joy deep down in there – that “peace which passes understanding” thingy – but we lost a dear friend and the world lost a great man this past weekend. A pillar of the Denver theatre community, and an awesome old soul, who passed into eternity way too soon for my taste. But, he’s on those other shores, and spreading joy in heaven. I do believe that, and that is the comfort we hold on to.

Jeffrey Nickelson was a great guy and a good soul and mentor to many, many people. He was a student of my hubby’s at the National Theatre Conservatory, and went on to found a wonderful theatre company, Shadow, which did great work and reached out to the Denver community in a million ways. We have all kept in touch via Facebook, where he regularly posted beautiful Bible verses and encouraging sayings for the benefit of all. He was real; he was a true visionary and artist; and he touched the lives of everyone he met.

So, this week, will you join me in praying for his family and friends, and the theatre peeps he mentored and touched, and for those who will be at a memorial service in his honor? They’ve been instructed NOT to wear black – that it is a celebration of his life. Which is as it should be.

The day he died (of a heart attack) was last Saturday, and he had posted this as his final status update: “Look someone in their eyes today, and make sure they know you love them . . .”

So, here’s to our friend Jeff Nickelson, who is doing great things in heaven, and whose brilliant light still shines in so many lives - the lives of those of us who are still on this mortal coil.

And isn’t THAT what it’s all about?

Teresa Roberts Logan is a comic, and is usually MUCH funnier than this, but offers no apologies for it, because she is so transparent and stuff. She has a website!, and you can buy her funny stuff at Zazzle.com, and follow her on Twitter, of all things. And, as you may have noted already, that she is a Redhead who Laughs, hopefully more than she cries. (And you'll laugh at her upcoming DVD release Comedy Angels, featuring Teresa plus four other hilarious, femme club comics who are also Christ-followers.)

Read more of Teresa's The Raving Redhead columns:

• Jumping Off Point
• Travelin' Goobers, Part Two
• Travelin' Goobers, Part One
• Be Encouraged, I'm a Failure
• “Little Ladies” Backlash
• No Matter What Barbra Sez ...
• Priorities and Art
• Cartoon Column #1
• TV's New Reality
• Begging for Grace
• Faith of a Child
• To an Unknown God
• "Opposite" Beauty
• The Customer is Always Ticked
• 'Pictures' of Jesus
• Translucent Nerds and Other Hazards of Being Human
• Dreamin’ a Dream
• Christian v. Christian
• The Countess and the Cryptkeeper
• Almost Famous
• “God Hates [BLANK]?”
• Apology Excepted
• Open Letter to Rush